Written by Evi Idoghor
Grief is something that we all go through at some point in our journey through life. Most of the time, it happens because of the death of a loved one. When something like this happens, some people become reclusive, while others are left emotionally shattered. As a result, if proper precautions are not taken, the course of their lives will be irreversibly altered. So, what is the best way to deal with grief? The following are four ways that I have found to be effective.
Acknowledge your pain: When a loved one passes away, some people find themselves in a state of denial, which is understandable, especially when the death was unexpected. However, if you want to deal with your grief in a healthy way, you must first acknowledge that you are suffering so that others can offer you the support that you require.
Give your pain to God: The Bible encourages us to do, just as depicted in Psalm 55:22 (and 1 Peter 5:7), “Cast your burden on the Lord, and he will sustain you; he will never permit the righteous to be moved.” Thus, the holy scriptures are laced with encouragement for people dealing with such pain. 1 Thessalonians 4:13-14 provides us with the hope we can cling to, when dealing with grief – “But we do not want you to be uniformed, brothers, about those who are asleep, that you may not grieve as others who do not have hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and rose again, even so, through Jesus, God will bring with him, those who have fallen asleep.” We find comfort in such words, and they provide us with something to look forward to, which is why it is essential for everyone to repent of their sins (Acts 17:30), to gain access to this comfort and hope.
I recall the feelings of despair I experienced in the days leading up to the death of my beloved mother. I couldn't imagine living my life without her by my side. Twenty-one years had passed since we had formed an unbreakable bond, and having the rug pulled out from under me was the kind of shock I had not anticipated in my twenty-one years on this planet. There was one thing I did have, and that was my faith.
During her hospitalization, I prayed to God for a miracle, not realizing that the miracle would be my ability to cope with her death with such grace. My father was awestruck by what I demonstrated; in fact, it was rumored that I did not shed a tear as a result of the way I continued to encourage others not to lose hope. God was with me during those difficult times, he encouraged me with scriptures, and he restored my strength to me. Run to God with your heartache, and he will provide you with peace amid the chaos that is erupting in your mind.
Surround yourself with loved ones: The temptation to isolate ourselves when confronted with a life-altering event such as grief can be very strong. We have a tendency to create an unsafe distance between ourselves and those we care about the most, and we can even be brutish towards them at times. That is not a healthy way to deal with pain; instead, allow your loved ones to show you that they care about you even when you are at your lowest point. Allow them to spoil you, just sit with you and offer words of encouragement. Allow them to embrace you and pray with you. Do not underestimate the importance of belonging to a community, especially when going through difficult times in life; we were not created to face life on our own.
Do some of the things you love: Following the death of a loved one, I understand that turning on your favorite show or movie, going to a game night with your friends, or taking a swim are the last things on your mind. But doing so helps to take your mind off the pain and provide you with some joy amid what you are going through.
I hope this short piece provides some encouragement for those dealing with grief. What do you think of this article? Leave your thoughts in the comments section below. Also, remember to like, share, click the subscribe box at the top to subscribe, and never miss an update on Let’s Talk Nation Blog.
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Thanks for this, Evita!